September 11, 2007 · 4:12 pm

Larry Crabb at the Society for Christian Psychology


6 years ago today…remember what you were doing?

Today, the Society for Christian Psychology is meeting for its third annual meeting. Larry Crabb spoke this morning on the topic of Christian psychology. He acknowledged the value of empirical research but talked about being somewhere between Christian psychology and Biblical counseling because empirical work is not his work. His work is to hang out in the Scriptures to understand how God is at work in human healing. He’d like to see our group develop a core dogma that grounds us without being dogmatic. He wants to see a body of thinking that arouses the passions, that transforms, that refines, and isn’t merely intellectually coherent. So what should be the framework for a Christian psychology? Here are his non-negotiable core truths:

1. Final reality is relational not propositional. Truth is not the center of reality unless you define truth as a person. Christian psychology must be rooted in trinitarian theology. The central nature of God is not a substance but a passion.

2. We are wired with the capacity to enjoy God more than any other source of joy. Everything else should pale.

3. Our capacity for enjoying God has been lost in the fall. However, the space designed for enjoying God has remained. It is now perverted into a demanding emptiness searching for fullness anywhere but from God. Our deep longing for love from God has become a demand for pleasure, power, meaning.

4. Our capacity to want God has now been restored in God’s children. But, our natural enmity against him remains and therefore the battle ensues. There is a fundamental battle in our souls going on right now–beneath whatever organic problems and abuse. We have the hope of fulfillment in God but not the actuality.

In many respects I hear Larry not talking so much about Christian psychology but the struggle he has in his own life to understand what God is up to. He is very much, as he suggested, a tortured soul.

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September 10, 2007 · 3:11 pm

Where is my wallet? Why we find it hard to learn some really important lessons


It never fails, I temporarily lose my wallet when I have to be someplace. Last night, while getting ready for an early am flight today, I couldn’t find my wallet. Looked in all the usual spots, including my pockets but no wallet. I knew I had it a few hours before so it couldn’t be far. And yet I couldn’t find it. So, off I run around the house looking here and there with a growing sense of urgency. My wife didn’t even get up to look. She’s been through the fire drill too many times before.

Adding to the sense of urgency was my last trip where I got to the airport only to discover no wallet and no photo ID.

Why is it that things like wallets disappear right when they are most needed? Well, if I’m honest, that is the wrong question. The right one is, why don’t I always put my wallet in the same place every time when it is not in my pocket. The answer is likely that I don’t think about the crisis until the crisis. I’m too willing to put it in the right spot later when it might be more convenient for me. This method “works” for me a good portion of the time. The crisis only happens every time I go on a trip. Now if I went on a trip every week, I suppose I’d learn faster…

Ever have that problem–that you keep remembering you need to learn some important thing but only seem to remember AFTER the fact? Some things I learn with only one mistake–like the time I went to fix a lamp cord but hadn’t unplugged the lamp yet. Other things need a couple of times–like the 2 times I accidently cut an extension cord with an electric hedge trimmer. Then there is my forgetting to wipe the table after cleaning up the kitchen and the dishes. We’ve been married 17 years and I’m still learning to go and wipe down the table in the dining room.

Relationally we fail to learn as fast as we might. An extrovert keeps thinking his/her spouse would want to go to a large party. We starting conversation with “constructive” critism but fail to remember that it rarely goes well. Or we say, “I probably shouldn’t tell you this but…” and wonder why no one trusts us with their secrets.

What is the lesson you keep forgetting to learn?

Oh, I found that wallet in my computer bag. Now what possessed me to put it there? Probably not wanting to forget it…

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September 6, 2007 · 7:53 pm

Live blogging from Nashville


On Monday I will be traveling, Lord willing, to Nashville, TN to attend two back to back conferences at the Opryland Hotel (after 4 days in that bubble where the temp never changes and you hear incessant water flowing I crave the outdoors). The Society for Christian Psychology will hold its 3rd annual conference and the AACC will then hold its biennial world conference. I will be making several posts to give a sense of what I am hearing at these two conferences.

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September 6, 2007 · 8:51 am

Last Hurrah for summer reading: Juan Williams’ “Enough”


Summer is officially over with yesterday’s faculty meeting. Monday is the start of the the new semester. Starting mid September, look for my multi-post reviews of Leslie Vernick’s freshly minted, The Emotionally Destructive Relationship: Seeing It, Stopping It, Surviving It (Harvest House) and Mark McMinn’s Integrative Psychotherapy: Towards a Comprehensive Christian Approach.

But right now, thanks to Ed Gilbreath’s Blues blog (see blogroll), I’m half-way through Juan Williams’ Enough: The Phony Leaders, Dead-End Movements, and Culture of Failure That Are Undermining Black America–and What We Can Do About It (2006, Three Rivers Press). With a title like that you know it has to be a rant. But boy does he take contemporary leaders (e.g., Sharpton and Jackson), rappers, and some city politicians to the woodshed. He minces no words when he chastizes those talking about reparations or excusing corruption (pay to play) in politics or the church. And he backs up his criticisms with facts. Apparently this book was born out of his exasparation over the way the content of Bill Cosby’s scathing criticisms (in 2004) of black culture and victimhood were ignored by black leadership. His point seems to be to call black folk to stop playing the victim/racism card and start acknowledging and fixing internal problems such as violence against women, single parenting, disdain for education and learning the language. If you have read John McWhorter, you will see similar themes in this book.

So, how should white folk read this book? Try to avoid, “its about time someone put Dyson or Sharpton or Jackson in his place” or “Finally, someone is bringing up the 3rd rail in black politics–the racism card.” Why? Because it is like the observers of a fight where a bully has repeatedly beaten up a little kid saying, “Oh, stop you whining and crying. The bully’s gone. Get over it already.” No, we should still continue to evaluate how we folk benefit from generations of opportunity and seek to serve any “least of these” we come across. Let’s not throw stones but clean our own houses first.

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September 5, 2007 · 8:32 am

Anxious Calvinism and Red Sox fans


I confess I’m an anxious calvinist. Calvinists believe many wonderful things, but chief of the beliefs is the sovereignty of God. God is in control and is working things out for our good and His glory. He saves us and sanctifies us and ultimately will glorify us. So, what is there to be anxious about? Well, we live in a broken world and so God uses broken things to sanctify us and to cause us to lean on Him for all things. So, an anxious calvinist knows that God is sovereign but expects difficult things that can’t be controlled or stopped.

When it anxious calvinism leans too heavily on the anxious side, it would be better known as fatalism. 

How did I come by this? Well, my father is a retired minister in the 4 point Calvinist/Reformed tradition. My mother worries now and then.

No, I won’t blame my parents for my theology. Its being a Red Sox fan in a world where there is an evil empire (aka the Yankees) that frequently destroys hope of winning a division. So, even when they finally win a World Series (2004) and currently own the best record in baseball this year with less than a month to go in the season, Red Sox fans everywhere are anxious, looking over their shoulders, imagining the collapse of the team and visceral experience that things are not the way they are supposed to be. How does this work for me? My home page lists the most recent games by the Sox and Yankees. Each night I check with one eye open to see if my fears are confirmed that Sox lose and Yankees win. Last night, Sox won. Sigh. There’s always tomorrow for it to fall apart.

So, I’m an anxious Calvinist. I know that God works all things for His glory and my good. Sometimes I just don’t want to remember that we live in a fallen world…I try not to care but I can’t help myself. I know its “just baseball.”

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September 4, 2007 · 9:57 am

“Criminal Hysteria”: Should we stalk online predators?


Sunday’s Philadelphia Inquirer (Currents section) had an editorial by Mark Bowden about those who lure men via cyberspace into seeking sexual liasons with underage young women.  He believes that if you offer anything on the internet, someone, somewhere will be the sucker for it–even if it is completely outrageous and not plausible in the real world. He suggests that programs like “To catch a Predator” on NBC or other task forces (mentioned in the article) that lure men to have sex with mothers and their young children are only culling out the most idiotic of our nation–those unlikely to ever succeed in such a liason in the real world. He wonders if these programs only play on the dark thoughts that everyone has and uses media to enhance those desires that would likely never have risen to the place of an act without the anonymity of the internet. “Dangle temptation before a large enough crowd, and a few would-be sinners will step forward….New flash: There is evil in the souls of men.”

So, do these programs and the trolling efforts by police snag dangerous people or merely the foolish? Bowden seems to be suggesting that this is a fad born out of hysteria, just like the 1980s and the Satanic Ritual Abuse fad. Well, much of the SRA was hype and hysteria (not all though), but our data on child abuse and the impact of child porn is not hysteria. There are real numbers on child abuse. When 1:3 women (and 1:4 or 5 men) report unwanted sexual contact before age 18…

But, maybe we ought to have a go at trying to prosecute portals and sites that allow porn. Maybe we can learn something from China. They eliminate all sites that speak ill of the government. Even Google filters their Chinese search engine. If only Yahoo, Google, MSN, and AOL took the problem of porn and sex-filled chat rooms seriously what would become of the world? That is what it will take: individuals who want to spend their life erradicating the internet version of polio.

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Filed under Abuse, pornography, Sex

August 31, 2007 · 7:27 am

Looking for love in Harvard Magazine


Our house gets the mag 6 times a year since my wife is an alum of one of their grad schools. One of my little pleasures is to read and laugh through the personals in the classifieds. First the descriptions of the person. Men (and their aren’t many of them advertising this month) are vigorous, financially secure, tall, handsome, fun, active, and romantic activities. Women (and these are most of the personals) describe themselves as leggy, petite, slim, stunning, strikingly pretty, toned, sparkling eyes, active, having the eyes of this actress (reminiscent of Audrey Hepburn, only a little more French), the body type of another, and the face of another.

Then I love reading their descriptions of their tastes and interests. There are secret words in some that rule out all but the most snooty of tastes. I would have to google the word to figure out what this person likes. But then, I’m not a Harvard grad…

Here’s one:

“Profoundly warm, great teamp player with high fun quotient. Upbeat and flexible, addicted to social justice, solution-oriented….Lives big and courageously yet enjoys downtime….Drawn to documentaries, stories of people’s lives, hardware stores, supermarkets, storytelling music (rock, Jazz, Blues, Cuban)…”

Or, another that likes both coasts, Paris, some place in South America, the Hamptons and the Cape, Skiing in Vermont, Kayaking the London Canals, and opera in New York. Yeah, me too (except the opera). Hence why it ends with…seeks financially secure 55 to 75 year old… 

Okay, I have my laugh. Now I can feel sorry too. Where else would an MD, Harvard grad, intellectual and refined tasted woman find love? I’m sure its not easy.

Can you imagine an honest ad? “Tired, crabby professor with a paunch seeks young thing to bring excitement into his life. Not that into commitments other than to self…”

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August 30, 2007 · 5:10 am

Take this psychological test…


Okay, I have testing and assessment on the brain as I am preparing for a course on the topic. I forgot my lunch today and so went to find some paltry substitute from the candy vending machine. I looked over my choices and noticed one item was hanging and just about to fall. If I chose that item I just might get two items for the price of one. Clearly, someone had chosen the item but didn’t get what they paid for. But I was now in the position of deciding whether I would take my chances and benefit from the sad situation of some previous vending user. So, here are two forced choice personality questions for you (no, you can’t choose, it depends!):

1. Would you buy an item in order to get a “2 for 1” deal even if the item wasn’t what you would usually buy. Yes or No?

2. Would you select an item where a “2 for 1” deal was possible solely for the thrill/challenge of the risk involved? Yes or No? 

As for me? I’m more inclined to answer yes for #2 because of the challenge. But, I’m not really a gambler and when it comes to food, some things are much more important than deals. The item in question was beef jerky. I’m sorry, that isn’t food. Who eats that stuff? Now, maybe if it was a chocolate bar I don’t normally eat…

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August 29, 2007 · 11:15 am

The state and future of biblical counseling, Part 2


Let me first make two caveats about this posts before I talk about some of the weaknesses of the movement. I should first say that this and yesterday’s posts are not exhaustive evaluations of biblical counseling. Yesterday, I tried to describe what I think are the key features of biblical counseling–the features that I find very compelling. Second, remember these have to be stereotypes. Biblical counselors come in all shapes and sizes and skill level. So, try not to be offended if I paint biblical counseling too nice or not nice enough…

As I said yesterday, biblical counseling has spent much time considering how to disciple broken and sinful people through life in a broken and sinful world. Biblical counseling focuses on how to live faithfully, to act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly in the circumstances we find ourselves in. And yes, a key component is taking one self to task to put off the old self and put on the new.

What are some of the weaknesses?

1. Isolationist. Whether forced or by choice, biblical counselors have done less collaboration with other mental health theorists and professionals. This may lead to suspicion of other models and less interest in learning from the skills of others.  Frankly, sometimes it leads to dishonesty. Biblical counselors have benefitted from the insights or other christian and nonChristian authors. You do see evidences of cognitive/behavioral theory, evidences of particular ways of handling certain disorders. And yet, not many footnotes acknowledging those influences.

2. Individualist. Counselors recognize that counselees have little power to change circumstances or others. What they do have the power to do is to be responsible for their own attitudes and actions. However, moving to responsibility sometimes happens too quickly by biblical counselors. “Yes, your spouse’s critical spirit is a difficult thing…let’s look at how your response to her…Yes, your abuse as a child was sin, but now lets look at your unwillingness to…” We do need to get to how the counselee will choose to respond to their world and yet we also need to understand and name the impact of the community. Many false names (from within and without) have been given to these kinds of situations. Therefore, the person needs time to explore what names and stories they use to define themselves first. They need someone to hear their story even if it is full of misperceptions. Biblical counseling tends to deal primarily with individual change without looking at the impact of the larger system on that change.

3. Justice seeking; suffering reduction. If as in #2, the focus of biblical counseling has been on individual sanctification, then it may be that less focus has been on how to seek justice when sinned against and less focus on finding specific ways to counter the physical/psychological effects of the fall. Biblical counseling loving people need to advance our understanding of how the body impacts human responses to trouble. Some biblical counselors are beginning to do this. I think of my friend, Mike Emlet (CCEF), who has taught about how to think and respond to difficult, impulsive, and emotionally labile children.  He has helped me think about the role of the body in rebellious children. Why is it that children (and us adults) are more irritable when tired or hungry? While biblical counselors have rightly said that we ought not excuse our behaviors with circumstances. We shouldn’t say, “I’m sorry I blew up at you. I was tired.” It sounds blameshifting, right? And yet, some do have less control when tired and hungry. Can we be as careful in developing help as we are in developing accurate diagnosis of sin?

4. Exhortational and goal oriented. Despite progress, I think most biblical counseling is about telling and exhortation toward good goals. In reality, most of my clients know what goal they should be working towards and can name their sin. But they are still stuck. Biblical counselors need much more work (at least in their writings) on the nature of incarnational relationships and the change that takes place in counseling processes that include validation, choice, silence, reflection, etc. I think a deeper understanding of emotion and interpersonal processes might help here.

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August 28, 2007 · 11:47 am

The state and future of biblical counseling, Part 1


Tonight I’ll be speaking to a local church board on the topic of counseling models and the church. In particular, I’ll be exploring the strengths and weaknesses of biblical counseling and christian psychology. As a refresher, I looked at a draft of a review/critique of biblical counseling I once wrote but never published. Today I’ll give a summary of the finer points of biblical counseling. Tomorrow, I’ll mention some weaknesses that I would like to see addressed.

First, there is no one biblical counseling model. But, I do think most models are modern-day version of the Puritan pastoral care tradition best resurrected by Jay Adams and then a couple of generations of Christian Counseling & Educational Foundation faculty. Here are some key characteristics:

1. Its all about God’s glory and our perfection.
Since all of life is to be about the worship of God and enjoying the covenant blessings of being God’s people, then biblical counseling strives to be a combination of reorienting worship, mercy ministry, discipleship, and an aid in the process of sanctification. John Piper (2001 Living Faith Conference) offered this passionate definition that captures much of that sentiment—that biblical counseling is to be, “God-centered, Bible-saturated, emotionally-in-touch use of language to help people become God-besotted, Christ-exalting, joyfully self-forgetting lovers of people.”

Don’t mistake biblical counseling as ONLY sin focused. Like the Puritans, biblical counseling sees suffering as an opportunity to suffer faithfully and explore how we respond to suffering and sickness (either God or self oriented). Our responses to the difficulties of life do reveal what we worship and seek in this life: God? Comfort? Escape? Pleasure? Perfection? Being significant? Being Safe?

2. Sola Scriptura.
If you couldn’t tell yet, much of biblical counseling is Reformed. Scripture is central to everything post Luther and Calvin. The Bible isn’t a textbook on counseling and yet it is also more than a pointer to God. It reveals deep riches for every situation we find ourselves in. It offers rebuke, hope, comfort, training, insight, direction, and God himself.

3. Critical Evaluations of humanistic change models.
Biblical Counseling formed as a reaction to humanistic models of change that neutered the church as an agent of change. These models had lost the godward, motivational nature of human behavior. Thus the movement is quite adept at pointing out where models of change treat humans as only victims, as if they have all the power they need to change, etc.

4. Nonproprietary.
Biblical Counseling is based on the idea that every believer functions as a counselor to other believers. There is no need for secret knowledge, no guild, no professional credentials. While wisdom and Christian maturity may enable some to deal with more complex issues and people, the treatment will be the same for all: Seek the face of God, love God and others in the moment, trust God for things you cannot change and when things seem dark and dismal, repent and trust God all over again each day.

Notice this model is not particularly focused on ending suffering nor on teaching skills (but the model doesn’t oppose these either). Rather, one works with broken and sinful people in a broken and sinful world live faithfully and in daily trust of God for all things. The biblical counselor hopes to help the client respond in faith when angry, fearful, grieving, confused, etc. And when that happens, the client may experience more joy and peace and less self-induced turmoil.

But what happens when one is dealing with a bi-polar spouse? Or the relentless intrusion of disgusting and sexual imagery into the mind? Or the anxiety after sexual assault? Do biblical counselors have the tools to help end suffering where it is possible?

We’ll look at some of these questions tomorrow.  But, ponder a variant of a question I was asked a number of years ago. “Does Biblical counseling work to end suffering? Does anyone who loves biblical counseling work to advance our understanding of how the body works in the finest details? Would they pursue the best forms of teaching autistic children? Would they work to understand the way the brain processes trauma? If not, why not? Why aren’t their biblical counseling scientists?”

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