Over at Biblical Seminary’s faculty blog, I have a new guest post up pointing readers to 7 important questions to ask as they review their church’s existing abuse policy. One of the questions ISN’T whether or not your church HAS an abuse policy. I assume that every church has one already.
Read the post here.
Why do we have to study theology? I don’t need that to be a good counselor?
These are words I have heard from students studying counseling and/or psychology in both university settings and seminaries. What would you say?
Biblical and theological training in professional programs?
Most Christian institutions offering counseling or psychology graduate programs require some level of theological engagement. Otherwise, why exist? Some do so via specific course work while others embed the theological or biblical material into classic counseling courses. At Biblical, we do both. We require traditional counseling courses such as Marriage & Family, Helping Relationships, Psychopathology, Social & Cultural Foundations, etc. In these courses we explore counseling theory and practice from an evangelical Christian psychology perspective. We also require students to complete courses like, “Counseling & the Biblical Text” and “Counseling & Theology: Cultural Issues” where they engage biblical texts and theological study as they consider how it forms counseling theory/practice and shapes the character of the counselor.
Is all counseling theological?
Yes. And David Powlison in the most recent CCEF NOW magazine (2-4) talks about this very fact. Here are some choice tidbits,
…counselors deal with your story. In fact, they become players in that story. By word and deed, even by their line of questioning, they inevitably offer some form of editing or rescripting, some reinterpretation of your story.
Counseling is inescapably a moral and theological matter. To pretend otherwise is to be naive, deceived, or duplicitous.
…all counseling uncovers and edits personal stories…. All counseling must and does deal with questions of true and false, good and evil, right and wrong, value and stigma, glory and shame, justification and guilt.
All counseling explicitly or implicitly deals with questions of redemption, faith, identity, and meaning.
Thus, if value-free counseling is not possible (the very questions we ask lead clients in one direction or another), then it stands to reason that every counselor ought to explore the theologies (doctrines, interpretations, beliefs, etc.) he or she brings into the counseling room. Who is God? How does God operate? What is the purpose of the Bible? Does it have anything to say about my life, my attitudes, my relationships? What is sin? What is my purpose in life? What does God think about my suffering? And on we could go.
But counseling is NOT theologizing
But lest you think that Christian counselors spend a great deal of time plying clients with the right answers, on sin hunts, or catechising clients, let us remember that exhortation rarely makes for good counseling. In fact, most clients are well aware of their sins–even those who do not call themselves “believers.” And those who have correct theology are not less likely to have trouble in their relationships or less likely to struggle with racing thoughts or depression or less likely to get caught in addictive behavior.
Instead, good christian counseling consists mainly of,
Wait, just what is Christian about these three points? Couldn’t unbelieving counselors agree with this list? Sure they could. What makes these three activities Christian is the submission of both counselor and client to core convictions and practices of Christ followers.
The website, www.christianpost.com has picked up one of my recent blog posts about whether our bodies can cause us to sin. Never heard of the site before but nice to be noticed. You can see the post here if you missed it on my site: http://blogs.christianpost.com/guest-views/can-your-body-cause-you-to-sin-11696/
Over at Biblical’s faculty blog I have a new post discussing top abuse prevention and response strategies. These are the most common strategies found in my students’ papers. There are certainly many more strategies and more detail to be had for each item, but for any church looking to review its preparation for an allegation, these five make a great place to start.
If you go to a counselor, you’d probably prefer that person to be awake versus asleep, to pay attention to you versus check their smart phone, to respond to what you are talking about versus make non sequitur responses. As I’ve noted here before, it is probably better to have a counselor who cares about you than one who has a big bag of techniques–though most of us would prefer our counselors to care AND be competent.
Therapeutic presence is a way of talking about the act of being with our clients in such a way as to build safe, trust-filled relationships where clients can grow and change. I think most people can easily identify failures of therapeutic presence. Try these on for fun:
CLIENT: I’m just so depressed.
THERAPIST: You think you are depressed? Let me tell you about depression. I have a client who just lost job, family, church, home. Now, that is something to be depressed about. You just had a bad day, that’s all.
Or,
CLIENT: I don’t understand why God would take away this job from me.
THERAPIST: Well, theologically speaking, God does things for all sorts of reasons. He sometimes does this to cause us to trust him more, to reveal some sin, to give him glory.
Notice how both responses fail miserably to be either therapeutic or present with the person in the moment of counseling. Not hard to miss, right? So here’s a question: Why do so many of us counselors, even seasoned ones at that, fail the “presence” test?
My answer? When we fail to be present in helpful ways, it reveals a lack of preparation and a lack of attention to purpose.
Shari Geller and Leslie Greenberg (in Therapeutic Presence: A Mindful Approach to Effective Therapy. APA, 2012) define the building blocks of therapeutic presence as
Sound like mumbo-jumbo? Here’s another way of putting it. What does a counselor need to do to be ready to be in tune with their clients? What do they do to stay in tune when with clients, and are they aware of when they are failing to be in tune? (If I am unaware, then I am likely to get out of tune.)
Here are some things counselors ought to be asking themselves:
Therapeutic presence isn’t everything. I could be present with someone and no healing might take place. But without therapeutic presence, I will only be a barrier to whatever growth is taking place. When I do it well, I imagine that I might see just a tiny glimpse of how Jesus was with the woman caught in adultery, the Samaritan woman, or with Peter after he had abandoned Jesus.
At 6 pm, our class/conference kicks off at BranchCreek church (Harleysville, PA) and runs through tomorrow afternoon. Boz Tchividjian of GRACE and myself will be providing plenary and breakouts on a variety of topics designed to help church leaders and counselors prevent and respond well to abuse within the church family. We are expecting a good crowd of pastors, church leaders, mental health workers, and of course, grad students!
Still want to come?
It is not too late. Information here. Bring payment (CC or cash/check) to the door. We’ll fit you in!
Filed under Abuse, christian counseling, Christianity, counseling, counseling and the law, ethics
Over at the faculty blog at www.biblical.edu I have this first post of two on the topic of how our bodies influence our behavior. I raise two questions:
1. Can our bodies cause us to sin?
2. If so, are we responsible or culpable?
Filed under biblical counseling, Biblical Seminary, counseling, Psychology
We all know that we shouldn’t wait until our house is on fire to purchase insurance on our home. We all know that a will is necessary before we die. But, do you know that most churches do not have any plan to deal with an allegation of child or adult abuse? While no plan is foolproof and almost every abuse allegation contains unique features requiring difficult decision-making, a basic plan usually contains directions for who will make sure plans are carried out and how the church will handle both victim and offender.
Maybe one of the reasons many churches fail to have a plan is that they aren’t really convinced a plan is central to the work of the Gospel–as central as a doctrinal statement or the preaching of the Word. Maybe such a plan is seen as a necessary evil like unto car insurance, something you know you should have but are annoyed to pay such a large bill even though you haven’t needed to use the benefit.
Read my faculty post here over at www.biblical.edu for 2 Gospel reasons why every Christian organization needs an abuse response plan.
Counselors often use what they call “additive” words to help flesh out the thoughts, feelings, and experiences of their clients. For example,
CLIENT: I feel so frustrated about how long it is taking for me to hear about the job I applied for.
COUNSELOR: You’re feeling anxious?
Certainly, my example is superficial and simple but you get the point. Frustrated doesn’t really adequately describe the true feelings of the client. We sometimes need help with defining what we really feel, think, or believe. This word addition happened to me today in a powerful way.
Today I was telling someone about a repeated discouragement I have experienced in recent months. In describing my experience I used the word “rumination” to describe the re-occurring thought pattern. She deftly said just one word.
“Grumbling?” [well, in fairness, that is what I remember]
That one word changes everything. When I choose to describe myself as having a repeating thought–a rumination–I am accurate if I am speaking only about the repeating part of the thought pattern. But notice that “rumination” doesn’t evaluate attitude or belief. What my trusted friend was trying to tell me was that I was allowing myself to have a pity party. I was accepting the disappointment feelings without any evaluation of what it was that I believed about the situation at hand. Truthfully, she was right. I was accepting the thoughts and feelings as accurate rather than interpretative of my situation.
Now, I am not arguing that those who have actual ruminations (a part of OCD) are all grumbling. But, it is a good reminder that the words we use do shape our perceptions of our life! We do not just respond to disappointments, we interpret them.
Filed under Cognitive biases, counseling, counseling skills
Is closure after trauma, grief, or some other sort of suffering a realistic goal? If so, how would you know when you arrived?
My colleague, Bryan Maier has a short review post of the book Closure: The Rush to End Grief and What it Costs Us. I think you will find his thoughts compelling to consider.
Sounds like a book we should all read.
Filed under Uncategorized
Musings on Faith and Psychology 