January 1, 2007 · 12:20 pm

Hello 2007: Thoughts about time


Happy New Year.

Time to think about time (past and future). How will I use or waste my time this year? Didn’t make any New Year’s resolutions, in part because I know I will break them. And yet, I am thinking about how I want to be more mindful of my time this year. How will I try to do this?
1. Enjoy life. This means I want to be more intentional about enjoying life with family and friends, to be more focused on the present and less focused on what I have left to do. Sounds hedonistic? That’s okay because God put me in this life to enjoy it fully. We are not merely here to wait for heaven.
2. Love others. Yesterday my pastor reminded us that the only debt we should have is the debt of love (Romans 13). Lord, help me to love my family and think more of their needs and less of my own. [Ironically, as I write this, I’m challenged to deal with a discipline issue with one of my sons–and tempted to overpower him with my “righteous” indignation.
3. Know God. I must admit that mostly I live life as a practical atheist. I think I’m in charge and in control of my own life. Prayer is more for blessing of my desires rather than looking for what God is already doing around me. I want to see him in the little things, the annoying things, the interruptions, the unplanned interactions, etc. I must practice the daily art of longing for God.

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Here’s a question for you: Do you feel better or worse at new beginnings? Do you feel better in January than December? How do you view time? Are you an eternal optimist (“It’s gotta get better”)? Fatalist (Not thinking about life, just keep moving)?  Or other.

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December 29, 2006 · 6:40 am

Memories observed from 40,000 feet


In the fifth chapter of The End of Memory Volf continues his quest to find the answer to the question, “How can we enjoy the blessing of memory without suffering its curses?” Thus far he has called us to remember truthfully, and to remember intentionally so as to seek healing for all. To remember wrongs done to us this way causes us to not be preoccupied with self but to remember for the sake of the good of others. But he reminds us that memories of wrongs suffered seem to speak confusing messages. So, how do we remember well? From 40,000 feet. When we are able to survey the entire landscape, we have a greater chance of seeing not merely the most intrusive memories but also how they fit into the sacred story of God’s creation. Continue reading →

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Filed under Abuse, book reviews, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder

December 28, 2006 · 6:38 am

Mindful of God’s presence in the beauty of the Maine wood


There is a pine and birch wood behind my parent’s house. A path crosses the back corner of their lot and traverses along a brook and bog. I’m sure it was once a logging road, but now parts have little trees growing in the middle. The wood is reclaiming portions of the trail and in a few years only the keenest eye will spot glimpses of the leaf filled ruts. In other parts, the trail looks new thanks to 4 wheelers and snowmobiles. Soon after leaving my parent’s lot, the trail passes by a boggy pond. Beavers once had a house here and you can still see old tree trunks gnawed to a pencil point. But now the pond is merely a few deep pools with grass growing in odd places. Ice forms around the edges but much to thin for my tempted foot.  After the pond, the trail moves up and on through birches and open woods. It passes through a thick stand of tall pine trees and back again to birch, popular, and maple trees.

I love walking this trail. There are houses near by and some now visible as they encroach on “my” trail. And yet, I can lose myself in the quietness of the wood. Squirrels chatter, small birds chirp, a few old oak leaves, still unwilling to fall to the ground, rustle in the wind. With any luck, a little snow will let me see the tracks of deer, rabbits, a lone dog, a skunk.

Walking this trail feeds my soul and helps me to see that God has made a beautiful world. It stirs the imagination in many ways. I must remember to find ways to see this beauty in Philadelphia.

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December 27, 2006 · 6:19 am

Blunting the ‘wounding blade’ of painful memories


In chapter 4 of Volf’s The End of Memory, we find that memories are not healed merely by remembering them truthfully. We saw in the 3rd chapter that truthful memory is a beginning but now he points out that memory is not merely a cognitive act. They are “also a form of doing (67).” Memory is both passive (pops into our heads without our consent) and actively pursued. We use or “act on” our memories and they, in turn, “act on us, too.” Volf uses most of this chapter to explore this problem: “But how is it possible to remember truthfully when distortions of memories are a deep wound’s most frequent manifestation?” [because of the truth of the victimization is too difficult to bear]. He asks, “How can we blunt the wounding blade of painful memories without sacrificing their truthfulness?” (76). Continue reading →

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December 26, 2006 · 6:32 am

Should we embed psychologists in the military?


A few days ago NPR ran a story on a California national guard unit embedding psychologists into their unit. (Listen to the story here). The program is an experiment to see if they can break the stigma of getting help from mental health professionals when they experience PTSD and other traumas. I would assume they are trying to do more than just break the stigma. They’d like to prevent problems or treat before things get too bad.

Near the end of the story, they talk to 2 soldiers about the program. Both are highly negative and list two problems: (a) they feel that the psychologists are unable to really understand their experiences since they weren’t there in the battle, and (b) they feel the counselors are intrusive–“always trying to get in our heads…” They don’t want to keep thinking about events or to talk about their feelings.

Seems like a good idea on paper. Give soldiers a place to address the traumas of war before becoming full-blown. And contrary to one of the soldiers, good therapists can understand soldier experiences without having faced the exact same situation. But there may be better ways to spend the money and get the same results. Training chaplains to address these issues may provide a less stigmatizing and more accepted form of uncovering fears, struggles, etc. Training actual soldiers to provide various forms of debriefing or assessments may also be useful. One other problem is that psychology often finds a good thing (debriefing) and then tries to foist it on everyone–something that we now know is not helpful and can be harmful. Until we have a better sense of helping a variety of at-risk folk deal with the traumas of war, these kinds of programs aren’t going to be that helpful.  I’m all for helping our soldiers and I do think we psychologists have something to offer. However, we have to avoid thinking we already know everything and spend a fair amount of time listening and learning first.

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December 25, 2006 · 6:59 am

Merry Christmas from I84, I90, and I95


Traveling from Connecticut to Maine today, from Kim’s family to mine. This makes 17 years of doing this drive. Looking forward to the quiet drive through CT, MA, NH and on to the woods of Maine. Hoping to ponder God’s invasion into our lives through Christ in between the various books on tape our kids will be listening to.

Merry Christmas.

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December 22, 2006 · 6:11 am

Euphemisms: Using language to hide evil


I want to share some lines from a statement purportedly made (dated 12/15/06) by the outgoing Ambassador John R. Miller, Director of the  Office to Monitor and Combat Trafficking in Persons. These lines are an excellent example of how the use of names/euphemisms cover up the reality of grotesque evil. [NOTE: I received a pdf document with Miller’s signature from a reputable source but I can’t validate it by finding it on the U.S. Department of State website. If someone locates this statement, let me know.]
It is my belief that we image God when we follow in Adam’s footsteps naming things as we see fit (Gen. 2:19-20). But unlike Adam (at the time of naming the animals), we are fallen creatures–prone to distorting names and calling things that are evil by flowery or neutral names. In fact, that is exactly what the Serpent does to Adam and Eve. He calls eating the forbidden fruit “seeking wisdom” when it is really a coup d’etat.

Enter Ambassador Miller’s statments. Here are some excerpts: Continue reading →

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Filed under Abuse, Cognitive biases, Great Quotes, News and politics, self-deception, suffering

December 21, 2006 · 6:50 am

Fixing the toilet is like going for marriage counseling…


I imagine some might think I’m referring to the smelly aspects of toilet repair but I’m not (though it would add much to the analogy). This last weekend I decided to fix the downstairs toilet. First it was overfilling. A new float was all it needed. Then, it was running every few minutes indicating that the ancient flush valve wasn’t keeping the water from escaping the tank to the toilet. So, back to Lowes to buy a flush valve (my toilet is old so it doesn’t have that flapper thingy). To replace the whole flush valve you have to remove the tank. To remove the tank, you have remove the two bolts holding it on. No big deal…unless they haven’t been removed for 25 years (oh, and there is no space around this toilet for a man to try to get in and work). Started working Friday night. Nada. One bolt off, the other stuck hard. In trying to get it off, I did considerable damage to the rubber washer around the bolt so that the tank would leak profusely if I tried to put it back together. Lots of black smudges on the hands from disintegrating flush valve that wouldn’t come off. No big deal, we have an upstairs bathroom and a pail full of water will flush the toilet if necessary. Oops, Saturday evening we were hosting our bible study’s Christmas party for 17. It had to be fixed during the day on Saturday or… Continue reading →

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December 20, 2006 · 6:35 am

Do we over-memorialize life?


I’ve been blogging on Volf’s End of Memory book. In chapter 3 he states that this generation is obsessed with memorializing events. Hardly had the smoke cleared from NYC before people began debating how to erect a memorial “when we could not possibly have had enough time to absorb the impact of the disaster and reflect on its meaning!” (40). Volf thinks there are two principle causes: Continue reading →

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December 19, 2006 · 6:43 am

Volf: Speaking truth, practicing grace


In the previous chapter of The End of Memory Volf determined that memory of wrongs suffered was an ambiguous event that could either heal or be used to harm self and other. In this chapter (3) he takes on the issue of determining how one benefits from memories of evil without also drinking the oft accompanying poison of hate or fear. On p. 42-3 he sets up his belief and concern:

Learning to remember well is one key to redeeming the past; and the redemption of the past is itself nestled in the broader story of God’s restoring of our broken world to wholeness–a restoration that includes the past, present, and future….Will I feel secure in the midst of abiding insecurities in the world, or will I always feel exposed to threats? (He offers many more similar questions regarding healing, justice, and meaning on p. 43).

To make movements toward healing, one must remember AND speak truthfully wrongs suffered by the hand of another. How do we do this? Volf explores 3 areas: Continue reading →

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Filed under Abuse, book reviews, Forgiveness, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, sin, suffering