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2 reasons why finding the root problem may not be a good goal for counselors


How important is it for a counselor to diagnose the client’s root problem? Consider these analogies:

Imagine being diagnosed with cancer in one part of your body but having your doctor tell you that it isn’t important to discover whether the source of that cancer lies elsewhere. You wouldn’t be happy and you would likely seek another opinion. Or, consider this analogy: you keep cutting off the tops of dandelions only to find that they keep coming back. Not a very wise decision. Instead, you find the tap-root and remove it if you really want to stop the weed from growing.

In the last week I have had three conversations about identifying the source or primary cause of someone’s emotional struggle. In each case I was asked questions about the source of the problem.

Is it a chemical imbalance? Is it the result of childhood trauma? Is the primary problem his sin?

I understand these questions. They are reasonable and important to ask. As a counselor, I am trying to assess how a particular psychological problem develops in an individual. But, maybe these questions aren’t as helpful as they first appear. Here are two reasons why we ought not put too much stock into seeking out the root problem and a suggestion for a different approach than the “why” question.

  1. “Why” questions almost always lead to a simplistic/categorical answer. Most psychological (or spiritual) problems have multi-factored roots. There are biological predispositions, experiences, behavioral choices/habits, perceptions, beliefs, etc. all working together to “allow” the problem to develop. Usually, we do not find this kind of complexity very helpful. We like to narrow things down to single or primary problems. Narrowing down to either/or categories helps us “understand” the problem and exert energy towards a single solution. However, when we demand a primary cause, we will almost always misrepresent the problem and may communicate to others a distorted image of what is taking place. Saying that a psychological problem is the result of sin or neurochemicals or family upbringing ALWAYS flattens the problem and as a result puts too much hope in any intervention.
  2. “Why” rarely leads to the most important question, “so, now what?” Let’s say that we can figure out why you struggle with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD). Your mother contracted a virus during the 7th month of her pregnancy and that virus altered your prenatal brain and caused your OCD. Okay…so now what? Notice how the why question provides interesting information and possibly helpful in eliminating the problem in future expecting mothers…but as enticing as it is, the diagnosis doesn’t help much with the, “so now what do I do about it.” In fact the desire to figure out the “why” never is as clear and easy as I have just made it in the virus example and so the search for “why” doesn’t lead to the “so now what” question at all. Now, I don’t want you to think that I care little for historical data gathering. The multifactorial etiology of our problems are worth exploring. We ought to take a look at how early childhood experiences shape our current behavior. We ought to explore the possibility of a biological predisposition to our anxiety. We ought to examine how our beliefs about self, other, and God influence our current problems. However, we explore these historical facets not because they answer the “why” question but because they help us understand “how” we function and whether we want to alter some of these shaping influences.

An Alternative Approach?

I’ve just tipped my hand in the last point. How is a better question. Finding out how a particular feature (belief, habit, experience, perception, biological process, etc.) influences current life and how a person might respond to or engage differently over a problematic emotional expression is more likely to bear good fruit. Consider these examples:

  1. How does your history with pornography and secret shame influence your seeking accountability from your other men in the church?
  2. How do you react to trauma triggers and what different responses to triggers might you want to practice?
  3. How do you want to think about or assess your unwanted sexual desires and feelings?

So, asking why we do what we do or why we are the way we are is interesting but not always the most helpful question from a counselor. Instead, explore your perceptions, reactions, thoughts about what is happening and explore how you might come to feel, think, or engage the problem from a different perspective or with a different goal in mind.

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Validating your client’s distrust of you


Ever had a person tell you they can’t trust you when you know they can? What was your response? if you are like most people, you notice the tendency to want to defend yourself. No, really, you can trust me. Why don’t you give me a chance? Or maybe your response isn’t one to beg but to back away and treat the person with a cool demeanor.

What should counselors do when a client doesn’t or won’t trust their intentions or motivations?Janina Fisher (see previous post) reminds us that the right responses is…acceptance validation. Especially with clients who experienced invalidation in violence and abuse. Notice that the effort to press a client to trust you or distancing from them sends the exact same message: your feelings and experiences are wrong and something to be rejected. Not surprisingly, clients feel invalidated once again.

What does validation look like?

You are right. You don’t know if you can trust me. Trusting important people meant that you got hurt in the past. So, not trusting me is understandable. So…what should we do? Validation doesn’t mean that we agree with whatever our clients say but that we find the truth and we underline it. Further, it means that we give the power back to our clients since many of them experienced being controlled.

Too often we think we know what is best for our clients and we try to indoctrinate them to our wisdom. Even when we are right, our efforts may unwittingly re-enact the stealing of power to set proper boundaries. Even when our clients want us to convince them that we are okay and worthy of trust, we ought to be careful. In everyday life we have to trust others, live with the possibility that our trust may be violated…and that we will need to respond to such violations with grace and truth. Promises to always be trustworthy perpetuate the myth that protection from all pain is possible in this life.

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eye contact and amygdala stimulation?


I’m in the midst of a CE training by Janina Fisher–Traumatic Attachment & Affect Dysregulation–and here is something she just said (not quote…my recollection),

When you make eye contact with another, you stimulate the amgydala. The arousal of this part of the brain arouses emotions, especially those connected with desire for or fear of intimacy. The point is that eye contact stimulates the attachment system which in turn plays on our feelings about being in relationship with others.

Later, she quoted someone (named Benjamin), “To be known or recognized is immediately to experience the other’s power. The other becomes the one who can give or withhold recognition: who can see what is hidden; who can reach, conceivably even violate, the core self.”

Thus, some clients (those who are ambivalent) find our “seeing them” (via empathy) as anxiety provoking. Counselors do well to help the client notice these reactions without over-stimulating reactions (which likely would trigger fight/flight reaction).

How you feel about making eye-contact with another depends largely on (a) how you feel about that person, or (b) how you feel about yourself. Both feelings depend on prior experiences and perceptions of self and other.

Try out a few moments of eye contact, either with someone you have authority over (supervisee, child, student) or someone who has power in your life (spouse, boss, teacher). What reactions did you have? Reactions in your body, thoughts, feelings? What impulses did you have? What does this tell you about how your brain works in regard to knowing and being known?

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Why is some trauma complex? A helpful distinction from Judith Herman


Counselors talk about trauma as if all traumas lead to traumatic reactions. They do not. Some people have significant distress from what might be considered slight traumatic experiences (surely an oxymoron!) while others appear not have any negative or ongoing reactions to very large distressing events.

There’s another problem. We sometimes talk as if all traumatic reactions are the same. This is also not the case. While the symptoms of posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) are well-known to many (i.e., intrusive re-experiencing of trauma experiences, emotional numbing and other attempts of avoiding memories or triggers, and hypervigilance), you can find counseling students and practitioners who are less aware of a cousin of PTSD: Complex Trauma.

Defining Complex Trauma

I’m reading Treating complex Traumatic Stress Disorders: An Evidence-Based Guide, edited by Christine Courtois and Julian Ford (Guilford Press, 2009). This is an excellent text if you are interested in exploring the symptoms, neurobiology, and treatment protocols for complex trauma. In the foreword, Judith Herman helps the reader clarify the main difference between regular and complex trauma

These days, when I teach about complex PTSD, I always begin with the social ecology of prolonged and repeated interpersonal trauma. There are two main points to grasp here. The first is that such trauma is always embedded in a social structure that permits the abuse and exploitation of a subordinate group… The second point is that such trauma is always relational. It takes place when the victim is in a state of captivity, under the control and domination of the perpetrator. (xiv, emphases mine).

For trauma to become complex one needs to experience the trauma at the hands of those who are most perceived to control a social unit (family, community, etc.). It needs to be repeated and woven into the fabric of distorted relationships. You can see that prolonged abuses experienced as a child prior to development of an understanding of the world and of the self would have more devastating impact than an unfortunate and distressing event that happens as an adult. If I experience a horrific accident and an unexpected attack by a stranger, I would not, usually, begin to feel unsafe amongst friends and family. I would likely continue to trust them even as I might not trust the larger community. However, if I experience repeated abuse by a teacher, a parent, a relative, a church leader as a young child, I do not have the prior experiences of safety to rely on and thus, I am likely to experience all of the symptoms of PTSD and then some more.

What More Symptoms?

Courtois and Ford give a cursory description of complex trauma on the first page of the book,

…involving traumatic stressors that (1) are repetitive or prolonged; (2) involve direct harm and/or neglect and abandonment by caregivers or ostensibly responsible adults; (3) occur at developmentally vulnerable times in the victim’s life, such as early childhood; and (4) have great potential to compromise severely a child’s development.

Adding to the typical symptoms of PTSD, complex trauma victims also struggle to regulate emotions, impulses, somatic experiences, consciousness, and evidence significant distortions in views of the self and others leading to difficulty forming trust relationships and finding meaning in life and faith.

Those interested in learning more about the current thinking on complex trauma conceptualization and treatment may find this book useful. Others may wish to check out the latest articles at www.traumacenter.org, one of the leading centers in the country focused on the problem of trauma.

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Male Child Sexual Abuse: A Survivor Speaks Out


Most books and stories about child sexual abuse are about female victims. Given the lack of material highlighting the problem of male child sexual abuse, many victims can feel doubly isolated since it seems that no other males experienced abuse. Those looking for a story about male child abuse and rescue might find R.A. Dickey‘s new memoir a good starting point: Wherever I Wind Up: My Quest for Truth, Authenticity, and the Perfect Knuckleball (Blue Rider Press, 2012).

R.A. Dickey is on the pitching staff of the NY Mets and in this book details abuse he suffered at age 8 at the hands of a teenage female babysitter and by another neighbor, a 17 year old male. The story is about his struggles growing up, his conversion to Christianity, and his struggles to reach the big leagues after being a very promising first round draft pick. What I like about this book is that it is not a happily ever after story. Yes, many wonderful and good things happen…but so do difficult things. Losing an 800,000 dollar first contract due to an anomaly in his pitching arm, repeated attempts to make it in the big leagues, a miscarriage, the loss of his fastball. Furthermore, he tells the story in such a way that does not promote himself. He doesn’t take himself too seriously and is more than willing to admit his insecurities.

Very little is about the actual abuse. He tells a bit about the abuse and how he felt, the smells, the experience (written in the present tense), etc. He also tells about his encounter with the teen girl some years later and the experience he had trying to confront her. If you know someone who would like a realistic read on the struggles of growing up with abuse and other family heartaches and finding one’s way, this might be a good toe in the water  kind of book.

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Ethics violations: Why we all think we won’t screw up…and one thing you need to protect yourself from you


Every counselor, social worker, psychologist, and other mental health workers get professional ethics education. Such training is designed to teach us to “do no harm.” What mental health professional gets into the field to do harm? We all believe we are going to work for the betterment of our clients.

So, why do we sometimes fail to act in accord with good professional ethics?

Rarely is it because we don’t know the rules. Consider the most recent issue of the APA Monitor on Psychology and the short ethics piece by Alan Tjeltveit (a colleague of mine and fellow CAPS member) and Michael Gottlieb. (You can read the electronic version here; turn to page 68.)  In it, the authors nail the reason why with this quote,

Too many professionals complete their training without the emotional education and awareness needed to avoid self-deception and to act in the prudent, considered manner that society expects and that represents professional ethical excellence. (p. 72)

Self deception

We fail to take a skeptical (note…not fearful) stance toward our own thoughts, feelings, and attitudes. Since we know we are going to work for the good of others we often stop considering that some other values that we hold might get in the way. For example, I might value avoiding conflict and so not address a safety concern with my client for fear they will get angry with me. Or, as the authors of the article point out, I might practice when I am too distressed to help others–because I believe I can still manage the situation (see page. 70).

The One Protection You Most Need

As necessary as it is to keep taking ethics updates from continuing education providers, it is even more important to have a close colleague who doesn’t take you too seriously and is willing to ask the hard questions. Yes, we need an operating sense of values. We need to be tuned to our conscience. We need the Holy Spirit’s help in loving our neighbor as ourself. But, more importantly, we need to stop trusting in our own judgment and acknowledge that hidden values sometimes operate more powerfully than we expect. Desires to be liked, to avoid conflict, to maintain power, to satisfy longings have ways of creeping in. One of the reasons God puts us in community is that we need others to speak into our lives.

Do you want to avoid ethical missteps? Who exists in your life who has the access and capacity to speak into your life; to ask questions others might not think to ask?

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Do you know where you are going?


Sometimes we really want to know what lies ahead on the road of life. Other times we do not wish to know–especially griefs that would be too hard to bear before their time. Even Jesus struggled to bear the burden of the cross when he asked that the “cup” pass yet knowing that it would not.

Do we not sometimes present the Christian life as if we are certain what lies ahead (in this life)? Certainly institutions like denominations and seminaries act as if they have great certainty in their mission and vision for the future. Yet, God has ways in changing our outlook and plans. Check out my brief thoughts on the changes at Biblical over at the faculty blog at www.biblical.edu.

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Military trauma: an opportunity for the church?


There were several military (Army) personnel on our flight to Charlotte yesterday. They announced over the loudspeaker that these men were returning home from a tour of duty in Afghanistan. The cabin filled with applause and many passengers personally thanked them for their service to the country. A couple of people in first class gave up their seats so some could ride in style on their journey home. Most of us felt warm and fuzzy. Certainly this is a better “welcome home” than Vietnam veterans received.

But beneath the good feelings are many trauma wounds that most of us cannot see. As the information trickles out about the rampage killing of Afghanis, we come to find out that the alleged shooter was on his 4th tour of duty and had suffered injury in 2 of the previous tours, including a traumatic brain injury. On top of that he may have been having some marital problems (4 tours could do that to nearly any marriage!).

While nearly all military vets do not go on shooting rampages, we do see that suicide rates have markedly increased, especially among females and reservists in active duty. One newspaper reported that an US vet kills him/herself every 80 minutes–but Iraqi vets do so every 36 minutes. Startling!

One barrier to getting help for symptoms of PTSD is that veterans are less likely to talk to civilians about their struggles. If you haven’t had to kill, it feels like you can’t understand what it is like to live with guilt, memory, of killing. This is understandable–even though civilians willing to listen can be of great help. Thus, it makes sense for every church with active military (or recently discharged) to find someone with street cred to take up the cause of talking to vets as well as their families. Most likely, someone on the front lines comes home significantly changed. If married, you can imagine how that would stress a family. This “chaplain” to vet families could be that person who is able to hear the struggles, point to God’s handiwork, and point to local services when needed.

PTSD is a destructive disease of the whole person. But, it can be treated, managed, and coped with. There are a couple of newer forms of treatment (Prolonged Exposure) that hold much promise. Let us not let these men and women continue to suffer silently. A first class seat can be a wonderful present but an ongoing presence and pursuit once home will have more lasting results.

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BREAKING NEWS? Professional Counseling Licensing Rule Changes on PA Governor’s Desk


Yesterday, The Governor of Pennsylvania, Tom Corbett, received HB816 after having been passed by both house and senate bodies. HB816 amends the rules for licensing social workers, professional counselors, and marriage and family therapists. These changes may enable a large number of MA counseling graduates, those who received degrees that currently do not meet licensing standards, finally get their licenses. Further, it reduces the amount of postgraduate supervised hours needed before being eligible for licensure.

Read the bill as it stands waiting to be signed by the governor here. Here are the key changes

  1. Reduces postgraduate supervised practice from 3600 to 3000 hours
  2. Eliminates the requirement to have graduated from a minimum 48 hour MA degree if received prior to June 30, 2009. Licensees still have to complete a total of 60 credit hours but having a 36 hour degree is no longer going to eliminate them from eligibility.

The rest of the requirements (passing a national exam, good character, etc.) all remain.These changes are also for social workers and marriage and family therapists.

For alums of Biblical Seminary’s 36 hour MA counseling degree, this should mean that they can now proceed to getting the required missing coursework and the required total of 60 credits rather than going back to get a new degree.

Pray that the governor signs!

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What is missing in Camping’s apology? The link between repentance and restorative justice


Ever had someone hurt you, apologize, but you still felt like something was missing? Did you think it was your problem because you couldn’t forgive? Is it possible that their apology didn’t go far enough? Have you had a chance to hear about Harold Camping’s recent apology for picking dates in 2011 for the rapture to take place? The good news is that he admits what he did was a sin and that he will no longer seek to discover the date when Jesus returns. Read his apology on the Family Radio website.

But there are a few problems with his apology. I mean…problems beyond his attempt to focus more on the good his sin did for the kingdom of God than on actually apologizing for the actual sin. His apology amounts to something akin to, “I’m sorry I was reckless and crashed your car but I got out unscathed and people heard me thank God for surviving it so it’s all good.”

What is missing? Acknowledgement of hurt, willingness to restore

Read his apology again. You will see he fails to repent directly to those he hurt most–the ones who gave sacrificially to fund his insanity. He never names the specific sins committed nor the hurts he caused. Further, and this is most telling, he makes no offer to restore victims of his offenses. If he acknowledges he misled people and in doing so received benefit from his sin, might he not desire to follow the path of Zaccheus? To give back what he took (that would be a start) and even give back more?

He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have something to share with those in need. Eph 4:28

Repentance is then shown not just in stopping bad behavior but replacing it with behaviors that are righteous and good.

What is restorative justice?

This week I will be in Tennessee speaking on the relationship between repentance and restorative justice. Restorative justice (RJ) is the idea that victims, offenders, and community ought to be in dialogue together to (a) understand the impact of offenses, (b) determine together ways to restore both victim and offender, and (c) to allow the community to have a say in the matter. It doesn’t oppose the rule of law but believes that the judicial approach is not always the best approach and tends to focus on punishment to the exclusion of restoration. RJ does not work unless victims are interested in it and offenders are remorseful. But, in those cases where there may be interest and some remorse, it may allow offenders the opportunity to get the depth of the pain they caused and offer them opportunities to “restore what the locusts have eaten.” (Joel 2:25)

Restoring vs. penance?

If you are like me you may be tempted to swing between to polar opposites when you are confronted with your own offenses: defensiveness or penance. Sometimes we want our apology to be the last word. We want to be forgiven and our offense treated as if it never happened. Other times we want to grovel and do penance so that the offended party will think better of us. During this season of lent, let us be aware of our offenses and the necessary sacrifice to cleanse us. But let us also be willing to seek the betterment of those we harm “with joy.”

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