Category Archives: Christianity: Leaders and Leadership

Frederick Douglass on American Religion


At the conclusion of yesterday’s staff meeting, Diane Langberg read to us from the appendix of Douglass’ slave narrative. He felt compelled to clarify his views on religion, and Christianity in particular. As with all great literature, this piece is timeless and ought to be revisited by us from time to time.

His main point? American Christianity practiced in the South is/was not authentic Christianity. In fact, it is another religion altogether. Here are some tidbits:

…between Christianity of this land, and the Christianity of Christ, I recognize the widest possible difference–so wide, that to receive the one as good, pure, and holy, is of necessity to reject the other as bad, corrupt, and wicked…. I therefore hate the corrupt, slaveholding, women-whipping, cradle-plundering, partial and hypocritical Christianity of this land. Indeed, I can see no reason,  but the most deceitful one, for calling the religion of this land Christianity. I look upon it as the climax of all misnomers, the boldest of all frauds, and the grossest of all libels…. We have men-stealers for ministers, women-whippers for missionaries, and cradle-plunderers for church members…. The dealers in the bodies and souls of men erect their stand in the presence of the pulpit, and they mutually help each other. The deal gives his blood-stained gold to support the pulpit, and the pulpit, in return, covers his infernal business with the garb of Christianity.

Douglass then goes on to connect Jesus’ description of the Pharisees to American Christians.

“They bind heavy burdens, and grievous to be borne, and lay them on men’s shoulders, but they themselves will not move them with one of their fingers…. But woe unto you scribes and pharisees…you devour widows’ houses…You blind guides! Which strain out the gnat and swallow the camel.”  

Where is Douglass’ assessment of the hypocritical nature of American Christianity still true today? Where do we accept things that should not go together? It is always hard to see it for ourselves. We need those irritating prophets who offend us but make us think. Douglass was such a prophet. Unfortunately, we tend to ignore these prophets in their lifetime and then other prophets forget that the message they have been given is not for their own personal gain.

Should you want to read the whole appendix (and if you haven’t–read the whole book!), here is the link to the text.   

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Filed under Christianity: Leaders and Leadership, church and culture

Famous speakers and their stories


Most speakers illustrate their points with stories. It helps the audience to use their senses, emotions, experiences, etc. in connecting at a deeper level with the concept being taught. I noticed a couple of speakers recently who told a story that nearly filled up the entire time they talked and only paid lip service to the points they were trying to make. These people had concepts in order to tell stories (of which they were the center!). On the surface, the speakers seemed very transparent and down-to-earth. It was refreshing to hear their struggles.

But something bothered me and then it hit me. I wonder if these speakers could talk for an hour on points and never tell a story about themselves. Since I’ve heard these speakers before several times, I suspect they could not.

So, here’s my question. Does becoming famous make you ego-centric? Or, does ego-centrism plus charisma lead to fame?

Here’s why I think this practice is dangerous amongst Christians. Instead of the story pointing to Jesus; It has Jesus pointing to the person.

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Filed under Christianity: Leaders and Leadership, Cultural Anthropology, self-deception

Restoring the fallen [victims]


I’m blogging a bit these days about the restoration process for dealing with Christian leaders that fall into serious sin. In particular I’ve been interacting with the book Restoring the Fallen written by the Wilsons, Friesens, and Paulsons (IVP). But I take a break from the issues of the fallen leader to talk about the very important issue: the restoration of the victims.

 

A few days ago, I received a private letter in response to my initial blog entries on the topic. With permission, I’ve copied a couple of this victim’s thoughts on feeling lost in the restoration process,

 As you can imagine, I have read with great interest your recent entries on “Restoring the Fallen.” I am in ABSOLUTE agreement with the fact that a team needs to be formed to walk through the restoration process for a fallen pastor, counselor, leader, etc. And, I am in ABSOLUTE agreement with you when you suggest that every leader ought to have a team like this surrounding him and holding him accountable to PREVENT him from falling. I couldn’t agree with you more on that point, and believe that we would see alot less leaders “falling” if they were surrounded by such a team.  What was so difficult for me, as a victim of a fallen Christian leader, is that when a leader falls, an incredible amount of attention often is given to him and his restoration process. In my situation there was a team committed to seeing him restored – making huge commitments of their time, energy, and more. And the victim? Where’s her team?Just because I’m not a leader doesn’t mean that I don’t need to be restored emotionally and spiritually…I wish that there would be such books [similar to Restoring the Fallen] that are as well written and give such good guidance and counsel when it comes to restoring the victim and understanding the wounds and pain for the victim and family. 

There are many victims of fallen leaders. The leader’s family (consider the agony they have to go through when the infidelities of their spouse/parent/child is made known to the public), the larger community (it often shakes the faith of many), and specifically the victims of the abuse of power. These are those who might have been vulnerable parishioners lulled by sweet words or threats into sexual activity. Maybe some believe that a leader/parishioner sexual act is mutual, but I do not. The leader’s power, gift with wordsmithing, ability to create a mood, and authority means that it is never mutual.

 

So, what becomes of the victim once the abuse has been discovered? The book that I am reviewing certainly does spend some time on the issue of what to tell the family, the spouse, the children, and the larger community. The authors recognize that victims are often branded as co-conspirators (p. 85). Rather than keep the situation secret, they believe that the truth should come out and “victims should be comforted, affirmed, and encouraged by all who know them and understand what has happened” (ibid). These authors are inclined to have the truth told so as to avoid further damage to the victim by embellishments, rumors, half-truths, etc.

 

The victim should also have his or her own spiritual care team to help them in the path of understanding, comfort, spiritual healing, forgiveness, self-evaluation (there are times that victims have made choices that put them in a place of danger; choices that come from a place of prior brokenness. This evaluation should not be misconstrued as blaming the victim but using the pain and suffering to do exploratory work that every Christian must do. It would be my opinion that while this work is necessary, it ought not happen first. Rescue and stabilization come before surgery). The authors suggest that the spiritual care team for the family of the fallen leader (and I would include the victim as well) should provide tangible security (a place to talk freely about the pain and confusion), stability (a calm reply to the inevitable anxiety and panic experienced), support (someone to stand up for them, challenge poor thought patterns in the victim), and spiritual challenge (to look for God’s handiwork in the midst of suffering). 

 

While care and healing for fallen leaders (and prevention in the first place) are important works that I am burdened about, let us not forget the victims (both the abused and the families of the offender) and let us make sure we give them seats of honor and a double portion of our mercy and kindness. Let us never forget that justice is an essential ingredient of the Gospel (Micah 6:8).

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Filed under Abuse, Christianity: Leaders and Leadership

What is restoration for leaders who abuse power?


Been blogging on Restoring the Fallen  and some of its ideas. Chapter 5 of the book is entitled, “What is restoration?” This is a key question we counselors face. The book really addresses this topic through many chapters but I want to highlight some of the points in this chapter:

1. “An effective restoration process must deal not only with the ruin of the disaster, but also with the internal weaknesses that caused it.” (p. 42). “…major lifestyle adjustments can be readily identified by team members as desirable goals, and these often become the focal point of restoration. They are not, however, what restoration is all about. If they are all that is addressed, the real work will not get done.” (p. 43)
2. “The foundation for restoration is reconciliation with God…For someone to desire restoration, he or she needs a renews view of God’s mercy and his demand for personal holiness.” (p. 44-5).
3. Restoration (healing, strengthening, rebuilding) is a choice. Either the person will choose not to repent, feign repentance, or repent and chose restoration.  
4. They do a nice job of describing pseudo-restoration

a. “lets just get this behind us” mentality
b. excuse making and justifying by pointing to circumstances
c. ignoring the impact on the family; ignoring the devastation to others
d. stopping with confession; then focusing on getting forgiven

Choosing restoration means,

a. confession of all secrets (a process NOT an event)
b. shunning denial and defensiveness
c. submitting to the care of others; giving up control for decisions

Of course, restoration in this context means restoration to God and to the people of God. It does not necessarily refer to restoration to former positions, careers, etc.

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Filed under Abuse, Christianity: Leaders and Leadership, pastoral renewal, Uncategorized

Choosing wisely your Spiritual Care Team


In Restoring the Fallen, (blogged first 8/13 on this book), the authors list qualities a spiritual care team member ought to have, using Acts 6 (full of the spirit and wisdom” as their foundation) (37f):

emotionally and spiritually mature, compassionate, committed to confidentiality, humble, trustworthy, cooperative, not easily intimidated/willing to confront hard issues, strongly committed to truth, willing to engage in self examination, willing to commit time, willing to commit finances if necessary, and more.

Interestingly, they suggest that pastors not sit on this team for other christian leaders due to the time commitments.

A friend of my sent me this article from Christianity Today that listed questions you might ask to discern whether a potential leader is wise:

1. Does this person live a life of grace?
2. Do others seek this person’s counsel?
3. Does this person live a consistent life?
4. Does this person show depth of thought?
5. Does this person show breadth of thought?
6. Does this person make judgments impartially?
7. Does this person understand suffering?

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Filed under Christianity: Leaders and Leadership, pastoral renewal

Spiritual health of Christian leaders


Well, my vacation was wonderful but now over. I ended it with a routine trip to the dentist for a cleaning (torture). It helps (I’m kidding) cement the reality that the fun is done.

While away I read a book, Restoring the Fallen: A Team Approach to Caring, Confronting, & Reconciling (IVP, 1997). Authors: Earl and Sandy Wilson, Paul and Virginia Friesen, and Larry and Nancy Paulson. It tells the story of Earl Wilson’s infidelity with a client (he is a psychologist) and the interventions his spiritual formation team enacted to help him over a multi year period of time. In between the story, they detail the best ways for a spiritual formation team to work through the process of repentance and restoration.

Very helpful. Over the next month, I’m going to blog a few of the chapters here given that it is so close to the kind of work I have done and am doing. They have put into words some things that I have done but not written about.

But, here’s my thought. This book suggests a spiritual formation team process for after the “fall.” Why not have one of these teams before a  fall? Why not have it as required care for the Christian leader, whether pastor, elder, missionary, counselor?

Here’s what they said they did as a team. They committed to:

1. Be in regular communication with both husband and wife.
2. Pray regularly (daily?).
3. Meet as a team regularly.
4. To consult with others who had experience in particular areas
5. To hold the leader accountable for specific promises made.

The team worked toward the following ends:

1. Spiritual health (interested in ferreting out the spiritual roots of problems, and to help the person become grou8nded anew in a relationship with God)
2. Body life (the team provides spiritual gifts such as discernment, intercession, admonishment, encouragement, mercy, etc.)
3. Accountability and sensitivity (the team acts as advocate for the spouse and family members as well as holding the leader accountable)
4. Penetrating denial and clarifying reality
5. Synergy (combined wisdom and consensus of the group led by the Spirit)
6. Intercession (“Restoration ministry is divine in nature and is characterized above all by grace. It cannot be driven by anything apart from consistent intercession.” (p. 37).

Obviously, this book is focused on the restoration of an offender. However, each of these goals and purposes ought to be part of a spiritual care team for any christian leader.  I wonder how many pastors, professors, counselors, missionaries have such a team?

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Filed under Christianity: Leaders and Leadership, pastoral renewal, Repentance, self-deception

What does Ted Haggard really think?


As most have probably seen, Rev. Haggard is in the news again. For fun, go type his name into the news section of google.com. You’ll find all sorts of news stories and satire. And of course everyone is picking up on the claim made that he is completely heterosexual, that his prior behaviors were only acting out and not evidence that he was gay–something he discovered during an intensive 3 week psychological treatment. Continue reading

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Filed under Christianity: Leaders and Leadership, Evangelicals, News and politics

The downside to rehearsing hero stories


Connecting the themes of Monday (MLK) and Tuesday (seeing your future), I’ve been thinking about how we romanticize our heroes and their lives, how we rehearse certain parts of our heroes’ lives and neglect the parts that are more like our own experiences. I’m not talking about ignoring their flaws but rather about the ways we ignore how difficult their lives were and the fears they must have experienced. We see the success (e.g., significant civil rights progress), remember how brave a particular hero was (MLK willing to be jailed despite opportunities to be bailed out), but forget the day-to-day fears they faced. What might become of me? Am I doing the right thing?

Did MLK know what was going to happen to him. One of his last sermons certainly hinted that he might not “get there” with the audience. And why not, he’d been stabbed, beaten, bombed, threatened daily for years. But I suspect there were days and nights of fear, worry, and second-guessing. There had to be days of wanting to go someplace to be safe and not ever bothered again. His challenge was knowing that since he felt God’s call to stay and fight was that God would be good enough and give enough “manna” for the next day.

I think we often rehearse the strength of biblical characters as well and at times neglect their fears. We see in much of David’s poetry that would suggest he spent many a dark night fearing that he would not be protected by God. It is easy to think about David’s courage with Goliath, his righteous response to Saul’s attempts to kill him, his joy in dancing before the Lord, but sometimes forget that he, like us, struggled to know just what God was up to in his life.

Thinking about their struggles not only increases my compassion but encourages me to keep waiting on the Lord in hope and faith for whatever he chooses to bring my way.

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Filed under Anxiety, Christianity: Leaders and Leadership, Civil Rights

True Apologies prove the existence of God


I’m a semi-regular listener to Harry Shearer’s Le Show on NPR (also one of my favorite voices on the Simpsons). Each week he reports various “apologies” given by news-makers in a segment aptly titled: “apologies of the week.” Ironically, and why it can be quite funny, the apologies are almost never that. They are defenses, excuses, and convoluted explanations. What are some of the typical non-apologies you might hear? Continue reading

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Filed under Christianity: Leaders and Leadership, conflicts, Repentance, sin

Read the Haggards’ letters to New Life Church


Check out http://tallskinnykiwi.typepad.com/ to see a pdf version of both Ted and Gayle Haggard’s letters to their church. I thought they were both exceptionally well written. Unlike many “apologies”, Ted actually takes ownership and doesn’t defend anything he’s done or get too focused on the parts in the media that might not be true. He also makes it clear that he’s not going to be coming back to New Life church as a pastor. That will help the followers not engage in the fantasy that he’ll come back and everything will go back to the way it was. Gayle Haggard’s letter is poignant as well. They both list prayers that we ought to be willing to undertake.

Its unfortunate but true that in the light of Truth, we see and grieve the destructive nature of our sins. Now if only we would remember that agony before we deceive ourselves the next time…I guess that is some of the difference between repentence and mere confession. If only I could remember!

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Filed under Christianity: Leaders and Leadership, Repentance, self-deception, sin