Today marks my 20th anniversary of marriage to my wonderful wife Kim. Twenty years ago today she consented to marry me–a young and naive boy with little evidence of capacity to make a living (at that time I had a BA in theology and was working on an MA in religion). Since then, she has let me practice into adulthood at her expense. This is not to say she had no misgivings.Let me tell you about it…
We met as Seminary students and had been friends for about a year when I got the bright idea that we ought to date. Our friendship had been built on spending time together on walks/hikes and her making meals for me every so often (it helped to be a skinny, poor seminary student). The idea of dating came quite clear to me when one day she told me she was going to go on a date with someone from church. I realized right then and there I had no interests making room for other guys. So, I opened up the “dating” conversation sometime in January 1990. It seemed an obvious and natural progression of our relationship. She did not see it that way. She wished to remain as (dreaded) friends but I was too young (23) for her and not her concept of a financially stable person. By some miracle I managed to hide my disappointment and accept the “friend” status. We continued to hang out as I was determined to not fade away. She, unbeknownst to me, polled friends and even a shared professor about me and got the overwhelming advice that she should not look down upon my youth.
On her birthday some six weeks later she let me take her out to a restaurant to celebrate. It so happens to have been a rather nice one. Can’t remember why I chose that one but I’m sure I was still trying to impress. During dinner she handed me a small wrapped box–the size a ring might come in. Beneath a bit of soft stuffing lay a piece of paper that said, “I would like to change my answer to yes.”
I knew right then we would marry. Six months later, we did.
Being young and naive, I didn’t know how much of a good woman I married. Here’s a bit of what I got:
1. A woman with a short memory for wrongs and quick to forgive
2. A woman willing to go on adventures with me
3. A woman who loves to learn and loves to talk about ideas, whether politics, theology, or baseball
In short, I got a great friend AND a wife all in one! I definitely got the better of this deal!
Happy anniversary Hon.