Yesterday our Lancaster county neighbors suffered a terrible tragedy with 5 young girls being executed at school by a local man. A friend of mine was recently and suddenly abandoned by his wife. Another friend has had several tragedies in a row. These things have made me think about the questions we ask in this situation. When these tragedies strike we often ask, 1. Where is God and why did he allow this? and, 2. What did I do wrong and why am I still struggling with despair? (this comes later)
Both questions are easily answered: I don’t know why (will never know why) and Nothing is wrong with you because what you are experiencing is terribly normal. Funny, neither answer is acceptable to us. And so we keep looking for the why and we keep mulling over why it is that we aren’t handling it very well. The why did God let this happen question is very biblical, very faithful to the God of all creation. Job, Jeremiah’s lament, the Psalmists, and Jesus himself asks the question, “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?” It seems we are to ask the question but yet learn to live with the silent presence of God. A helpful response once said by my colleague, Diane Langberg, I don’t know why this happened, but I do know that Jesus knows this experience of abandonment. The cross is where trauma and God come together. (my rough paraphrase). When we try to go further to understand the why, we err into speaking for God, just like Job’s counselors.
The second question does come later when we think we should be over the pain. Some traumas are like being knocked out by a punch. First we wake up woozy and numb. Then as our heads clear the weight of the pain really sets in. Every movement hurts. Many are surprised by the weight of the pain and think it means they are weak Christians. Says who? If Jesus is deeply moved to tears over Lazarus’ death, which he was going to reverse in a few seconds, shouldn’t we who wait much longer to see healing also be laid low by our suffering?
Musings on Faith and Psychology 