Recently watched a Dateline NBC show that followed two couples through intensive therapy to help them regain their sexual spark. In good TV fashion, the seemingly fragile couple got better and the couple that was able to have mind blowing sex split up. Its this couple that I’m thinking about. A couple with 3 children are able to have wonderful sex one night and the next day both are seriously considering divorce. Just shows that “good” sex is possible if both are willing to fulfill the other’s fantasy for a few minutes. But that doesn’t make a relationship does it. In this couples case, she had been playing the role of caretaker for her emotionally weak husband. He willingly allowed her to. When he began to get stronger, she realized she hated the caretaker role (I think she liked the power but disliked the responsibility) and when he showed some brief signs of backsliding, she was ready to bolt.
How does a couple state they are in love one night and are ready to divorce the next? Partly, it has to be due to both having quite an egocentric view of life. No serious conversation about commitment, the kids, etc. Their conversation was only about what they wanted and didn’t want. Sounds like a lot of folks I know (myself included). We look for a “treatment” to give us what we want. When it doesn’t produce, then we’re done and on to the next magic pill.