Today’s ethics class is going to cover the area of misconduct. Unfortunately, misconduct means here the illicit sexual contact between the counselor and counselee. In 2004, sexual misconduct played a role in 35% of complaints to the APA committee on ethics (2005 American Psychologist, 60:5, p. 526). How are pastoral counselors doing on this matter? Continue reading
Category Archives: Abuse
Science Monday: Sexual attraction in the counselor’s office
Filed under Abuse, counseling science, sexuality
Multicultural vs. multiculturalism
I’m continuing to read Infidel, Ayaan Hirsi Ali’s story of her life and transition from Muslim girl to atheist woman. Very compelling. After becoming a citizen of Holland and entering the political scene, she began to battle injustices and lack of freedom within the Islamic communities in Europe. She describes the reaction from native Dutch who found her abject criticisms of Islam to be offensive. When she spoke out against the government support of Koranic based schools because they limited critical thinking and continued oppressive views of women, the liberal Dutch thought she was giving unnecessary fodder to the hard right or anti-immigrant politicians. Here’s what she said about switching political parties: Continue reading
Filed under Abuse, book reviews, Cultural Anthropology, Great Quotes, News and politics
Unscience Monday: Insane reporting rules
At last staff meeting, Diane Langberg reviewed some new rules for PA re: abuse reporting that she learned at a recent CE seminar. Some of these make your head spin.
1. Psychologists are mandated to report to child and family any child engaging in sex (not well defined) before age of 13. Okay, this is good.
2. However, if 14, then it can be consensual (and not reportable) if the other person is not more than 5 years older. This could be considered consensual.
3. If a 15 year, 11 mo child has sex with someone more than 5 years his/her age, it is statutory rape. However, if a 16 year old has sex with someone more than five years older, this can be consensual. So a 50 year old can have consensual sex with a 16 year old. And yet, a child is still considered just that until 18. Go figure. You can have sex with anyone, but you can’t smoke, drink, vote, or go to war. Do these lawmakers have teenage daughters?
There are some good changes in other parts of the law but these just boggle the mind.
Missional church ministry to sex offenders
I think it fair to say that there are significant similarities between the treatment of lepers 2000 years ago and sex offenders today. Just as there wasn’t much hope for change for those with serious infectious disease so today we have little human hope that sex offenders (especially those guilty of acting on pedophilic desires) can change and be safe around vulnerable people. So what’s a church to do if they have a member or potential member with a history of violating others? Continue reading
Filed under Abuse, Missional Church
Jim Jones’ (People’s Temple) deception revisited
I watched the PBS special on Jim Jones and the Jonestown massacre that aired last night. I was struck by several things that at the same time disturbed and sobered me: Continue reading
Filed under Abuse, Cultural Anthropology, Historical events, self-deception
Thoughts on Inner Healing
In class last night we discussed the struggle some have with dissociation and Dissociative Identity Disorder (formerly called Multiple Personality Disorder). At one point we began talking about demonic possession and inner healing. As usually happens, there were questions about the efficacy of inner healing ministries. Should they be trusted? Are they good? Why do they work for some and not for others? Here are some of my thoughts on inner healing as a way through deep pain and hurt. Continue reading
Filed under Abuse, inner healing
Me time? Why are men inclined to distrust their women?
These thoughts came to me while listening to a song on radio on the way from class last night. Bear with me, it takes a bit for me to get to the point. Oh, and don’t miss my little swipe at Maslow at the very bottom.
Last night I was teaching on sex dysfunctions and therapy. Though some couples struggle with physical problems (e.g., exposed vaginal nerves, hormones, prostate problems, diabetes, medication-related, etc.), many have problems that find their initial roots in (a) knowledge, (b) expectations, (c) fear/trust/control. Despite the fact that we live in a sex-crazed world, many couples have distorted knowledge and expectations about sex (how it should happen and what it should be like) that lead to hurt, disappointment, fear, and withdrawal. One of the bigger problems is the differences between men and women in level of sexual desire. Now I’m stereotyping here and not every man and woman fit, but frequently men have great desires for sex and women find it more like work, even when they enjoy it. Here’s the problem for some men. Continue reading
Science Monday: Freud thinks forgetting is healthy?
I’m stretching the science end of things here to include some historical data. In chapter 8, Volf looks at the works of Kierkegaard, Nietzsche, and Freud on the topic of forgetting. The chapter is interesting but I’m going to skip blogging on Kierkegaard and Nietzsche and only make a small comment on Freud. Volf argues that Freud never saw forgetting as always having a deleterious impact on mental health. We know that Freud believed that bringing repressed memories to the surface so as to release pent up energy. But did you know that he also talked about removing or erasing memory? Volf recounts one of Freud’s cases (Emmy von N.) in Studies on Hysteria where he says the following:
…and I made it impossible for her to see any of these melancholy things again, and not only by wiping out her memories of them in their plastic form, but by removing her whole recollection of them, as though they have never been present in her mind. (Volf, p154).
How did he do it you ask? Hypnosis. Later when he abandoned hypnosis, he talked about the fading of memories through something called “effacement.” The idea is that when you “starve” memories by releasing/removing the affect given them, they fade into the misty past. This is not motivated forgetting in order to reduce distress, but the reduction of distress that causes memories to fade.
Makes sense. I forget things every day that have no meaning to me. But nearly hit me on my way to work with your massive SUV and I’ll remember it well. However, since most days I don’t have near misses, I’ll begin to forget…
All well and good, but if the abuse or wrongs suffered are so big or at such a critical time in life, can I ever really forget? Its certainly a lot easier to forget and go back to a “normal” time but much harder to do so if there never was a “normal” time.
Filed under Abuse, counseling science, memory
The impossible gift of forgetting wrongs done to you
Sorry for the brief hiatus from The End of Memory. Starting a new semester plus am looking at two books that I may review in some detail right after (Jimmy Carter’s new book on the Palestinian/Israeli conflict and Ed Gilbreath’s book on being a black man in white evangelical organizations–both have to do with dealing with longstanding conflict and hurts).
Volf in Chapter 7 begins a new section entitled, How Long Should we Remember? Continue reading
Science Monday: New rules for reporting child abuse
School starts today and so the chaos of the year begins…
The commonwealth of PA enacted new rules for professionals required reporting of suspected child abuse. Two changes: first, hearing of probable child abuse second hand at your work triggers a required reporting (prior to this it needed to be a direct hearing). Second, reports to child protective services are necessary when non familial individuals abuse children (doctors, nurses, teachers). Prior to this change, a person did not report these cases to child protective services but to the police as criminal activity. Continue reading
Filed under Abuse, counseling science
