Just thinking about how a few words said in passing can have the power to heal and/or hurt. I’ve talked previously how I think that naming things is part of the dominion God gave us over creation. We see it in Adam’s naming the animals as he saw fit. Of course, the Fall screws up our capacity to name things so that we call things good that are not, and we fail to name things that we ought. Counselors participate in this naming capacity because they often hold the power to name things going on beneath the surface. However, naming things too quickly or without enough concern for the impact is not helpful. Have you ever been hit with some “truth” by someone that blew you away? “And let me tell you another thing…!” Once, I told a friend something I thought God might be calling him to do (something he hadn’t planned on!). Some time later, he told me that when I said it, it wasn’t well received, it wasn’t what he wanted to hear. While he came to agree with my perception over time, he hadn’t been ready to hear that. I’m not sure whether I should or shouldn’t have said it, but I do know that I was fairly unaware that a passing comment would be that powerful.
And, in relationship to my posts on the Amish shooting, I am realizing it is very easy to make a passing comment and in doing so, create pain in others. In my original post I took issue with a spokesperson who seemed to equate forgiveness with not being angry. I still take issue with that equation. However, it would be easy to think that I was saying that the forgiveness offered was not authentic. In taking issue with one person who represented one idea I made a comment that could be easily taken to dismiss an entire people group. I don’t think of me having that kind of power, and yet I do. We do. And the power can get in the way of more important conversations–in this case, forgiveness and emotions responding to great evil.
This kind of power gives me pause with my words. I needn’t avoid naming things but I need to be aware of and receptive to the conversations that will ensue. I need to be inviting others to take issue with me and to challenge my view on things. The redeeming factor is that we can be guaranteed that God will use our words to induce ongoing conversations about important issues in ours and others lives.
Musings on Faith and Psychology 